How to Survive the Aftermath of Divorce Charleston SC

Most divorcess have to go through divorce counseling or seek community help for financial and emotional support just to get through this ordeal. Before you attempt to file for a divorce, here are some things you should think about.

Ms. Barbara Fox
Body & Soul Therapy
(843) 795-1100
2045 Maybank Hwy.
Charleston, SC
Credentials
Credentials: LISW-CP
Licensed in South Carolina
17 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Addictions/Other (gambling, sex, etc.), Addictions/Substance, Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Behavioral Problems, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Phobias, Sexual Abuse/Rape, Str
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Children of Divorce, Military/Veterans
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Children (6-12), Adolescents (13-17), Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Barbara Bettini
Barbara Bettini, MA, LPC, NCC
(843) 568-6933
1060-B Cliffwood Street
Mount Pleasant, SC
Credentials
Credentials: MA, LPC
Licensed in South Carolina
20 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Stress, Life Transitions, Women's Issues
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Sandy Davidson
New Directions Behavioral Health
(843) 737-6350
119 North Goose Creek Blvd. Suite B
Goose Creek, SC
Credentials
Credentials: LISW-CP
Licensed in South Carolina
30 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Anxiety/Panic Disorders, Bipolar Disorders, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Phobias, Stress, Trauma/PTSD, Life Transitions
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Children of Divorce, Military/Veterans, Step Families
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Kimbi G Marenakos
(843) 442-0006
Charleston, SC
Practice Areas
Couples & Family, School, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Kendra Woody-Simmons
(843) 958-3345
Charleston, SC
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Childhood & Adolescence, Corrections/Offenders, Counselor Education, Couples & Family
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Ms. Martha (Martie) Adams
Private Practice
(843) 884-3070
1012 Anna Knapp Blve
Mt. Pleasant, SC
Credentials
Credentials: LISW, CET, CP, PAT
Licensed in South Carolina
14 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Couple or Marital Issues, Family Dysfunction, Interpersonal Relationships, Psychosomatic, Women's Issues
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics)
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Ms. Judith Hoffman
(843) 209-0961
9263 Medical Plaza Drive Suite A
North Charleston, SC
Credentials
Credentials: LISW-CP
Licensed in South Carolina
16 Years of Experience
Problems Served
Child Abuse and Neglect, Couple or Marital Issues, Depression, Domestic Violence, Family Dysfunction, Grief/Loss, Interpersonal Relationships, Parenting Issues, Sexual Abuse/Rape, Spiritual/Religious Concerns, Stress, Trauma/PTSD, Life Transitions, Women's
Populations Served
ACOA (Adult Children of Alcoholics), Children of Divorce, Military/Veterans, Caregivers, Step Families
Membership Organizations
HelpPro.com
Age Groups Served
Young Adults (18-25), Adults (26-59)

Data Provided by:
Pepper L Sarnoff
(843) 556-8503
Charleston, SC
Practice Areas
Clinical Mental Health, Counselor Education, Couples & Family, Sexual Abuse Recovery, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Wendy Molinaroli
(843) 343-5684
Charleston, SC
Practice Areas
Addictions and Dependency, Childhood & Adolescence, Clinical Mental Health, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Lynn Graves
(843) 795-0238
Charleston, SC
Practice Areas
Childhood & Adolescence, Couples & Family, Depression/Grief/Chronically or Terminally Ill
Certifications
National Certified Counselor

Data Provided by:

How to Survive the Aftermath of Divorce

There are some relationships that can last forever. Unfortunately for most Americans, marriages are rarely grouped among these. A marriage can look picture-perfect at first, but as we all know, it will soon turn into a tiring struggle of differences. Now, when the bond between the couple is strong, some marriages do survive the bumps along the way. However, when the differences appear too irreconcilable, or when something painful happens between the spouses, divorce is usually the only option.

As “easy” as the way out may seem, in reality, it isn’t. A divorce can’t be done in a flash. It is always a very long process, and most disputing couples don’t even become friends or even remain civil with each other after the divorce. Most of them have to go through divorce counseling or seek community help for financial and emotional support just to survive. Before you attempt to file for a divorce, here are some things you should think about.

Financial stability

Do you have children, and can you survive financially once you file for the divorce? If your spouse has been abusing you and the children, then custody battles should be the least of your concern. You will surely get full custody of your kids if your spouse is less than capable of taking care of them. However, if you think that you may have done something in the past which your partner could use against you in court, think twice before filing for a divorce. You wouldn’t want to lose the children in this battle. This can be doubly painful compared to losing an abusive or cheating spouse.

To make sure that you can survive the ordeal, you have to look at your financial state, first. If you have a job, and you think that you can support yourself and your children even without the income of your partner, you will probably have a 75% chance of surviving the divorce with ease. If your income is not enough, or if it’s non-existent, now is the time for you to seek community help. Most states provide support for divorced individuals, especially women, who find themselves economically unable to cope with the situation. They can tell you about the benefits that you can get if you go through the divorce, and the job openings that you can apply for.

Financial stability is very important if you’re worried about getting custody of your children. In cases where both parties are incapable of raising the kids, the social services department can intervene, or the children may be turned over to relatives or grandparents until they’re of legal age and are able to fend for themselves.

Emotional stability

When it comes to surviving a divorce emotionally, one partner will always “heal” faster than the other one. This is caused by many factors, including spiritual/religious support, one’s temperament, and one’s preparedness for the situation. Most often than not, the spouse who filed for the divorce is able to cope with the changes faster than the one who got left behind. This is because the spouse who filed for the divorce or separation is already past the primary stages of separation.

Theoretically speaking, there are four stages of separation: denial, anger, grief, and finally, acceptance. The one who filed for the divorce has probably gone through all the motions without letting his/her partner in on the problem. By the time the papers are filed, one partner could be one foot into acceptance, while the other could still be in denial. This can definitely cause a lot of problems. Some spouses in denial even forget that they have divorce papers to sign, and they make desperate attempts to win their partners back. While there’s nothing wrong with trying to fix a broken marriage, you also have to think twice if it’s still worth it. It takes two people to make a relationship work, especially when it comes to a marriage. If the other party already has one foot out the door, “fixing things” can be close to impossible.

If you find yourself turning into a psycho ex-wife or ex-husband, stalking your partner wherever s/he went, and you find yourself destroying the house that you used to share, and getting drunk day in and day out, it’s time to get some professional help. Divorce counseling is designed to help individuals cope with the problem. Most of the time, both parties attend sessions regularly, much like marriage counseling sessions go. However, there may be incidences when the more troubled spouse needs to go through the sessions first.

In fact, divorce counseling should be standard in any divorce proceedings, no matter how civil or friendly the process may appear on the surface. Not only will this help both couples cope with the change so that they can take better care of the children, but this will also prepare them to make new friendships and relationships with other people once the divorce is completed. In most cases, the children themselves also need to go through divorce counseling simply because they’re the most emotionally vulnerable to the situation.

Support from family and friends

In damaging marriages, a divorce is not only an opportunity to reclaim you’re life back, it can also become a venue for you to patch things up with friends or family members. There are many cases wherein people get disconnected from their circle of friends or even relatives because their friends or relatives didn’t get along with their former partners. You can rest assured that if this is the case, your friends and relatives will come back into your life to give you the full support that you need.

What do you do when this happens? Of course, it’s always difficult to accept them back without slightly bruising your pride. You can expect them to say, “I told you so,” but that’s usually the worst case scenario. Friends and family, when they truly care about you, will be more than willing to help you out during this ordeal. If they offer to take the kids for the weekend so that you can take a break for a while, accept the offer. You will need it. If they offer to take you to the spa or invite you to picnics at the beach, accept the invitation. They may look like pity invitations, but so what if they are? The important thing is that you know there are other people who love you even if your marriage didn’t quite work out.